Monday, September 20, 2010

September 20 .... all good things..

I have been at a loss for what to write about. This strikes me as silly (crazy, moronic.. whatever) because things have been going really well! All my relationships are intact and flourishing even, work is good, Honey and I keep working at it and its good, things are good.

Seems more of a struggle - wrong word - to find gratitude when things are rolling along smoothly - than when there is drama and suffering going on. Its like this. I'm sitting here .. feeling good - which probably translates to grateful some how but that would spoil what I'm going to say - content, happy with my life .. and in looking for something to be grateful for I'm waiting for "that feeling". "That feeling" like when I'm writing and I'm in the midst of shit and misery and drama - then I look for something to "feel" grateful for and when I ping upon it it's like a salve .. ahh.. yessss.... gratitude. So you recognize it. That sensation stands in sharp relief to the downness of the drama at hand. Not so much when you're happy.... :) Am I discovering something here?

So let me rephrase... not only am I happy at the moment, but really, I'm pretty grateful to be that way. I am grateful that things are feeling good between Honey and myself, between my kids and myself. I'm grateful that we are having a spectacular fall, the weather has been sublime.

There is much to be grateful for on this happy, gentle day.

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